Life is a journey of constant becoming. Before we took our first breath and opened our eyes to this world, we were already in motion—shaping, responding, adapting. This understanding has been a cornerstone of my own transpersonal growth and healing, a journey that has taken me from early childhood trauma to an embodied, conscious life of purpose. I want to share my story through the lens of moving beyond menopause—beyond the social narrative of decline—into what my mentor Barbara Marx Hubbard calls “Regenopause,” a stage of renewal, creativity, and purpose. Barbara’s concept of Regenopause aligns beautifully with the concept of Dr Jaap van der Wal’s.
The Embryo in Us: A Continuation of Growth
Dr Jaap van der Wal’s work teaches us to see the embryo not as a distant memory of development but as a presence that continues to shape us. As an embryo, we were not static beings but a dynamic expression of life, moving and adapting, embodying the very essence of creativity. This idea of the embryo as an ongoing process profoundly shifted my perspective on growth. It reminded me that even in moments of struggle, I am not a finished product but a work in progress—a “performance of life,” as Dr. van der Wal describes it.
I’ve often reflected on how my own life mirrors this concept. Growing up in post-war Belfast, feeling abandoned and unwanted, I learned to adapt and survive. But survival is not the same as thriving. It wasn’t until much later, through therapy, coaching, and personal development, that I began to reframe those early imprints. I came to see myself not as a victim of my circumstances but as an ever-evolving being capable of rewriting my story. Cherionna Menzam-Sills adds another layer to this understanding.
Revisiting Our Origins
Cherionna Menzam-Sills explores how our prenatal and birth experiences imprint our psyche and relationships in her work. While powerful, these imprints are not immutable. She shows us we can revisit and heal these early experiences through awareness and embodiment practices.
This idea resonates deeply with me. One pivotal moment in my journey was recognising how the fear of abandonment shaped my relationships. Growing up, I internalised the belief that I had to earn love by being invisible and unproblematic. These patterns followed me into adulthood, influencing my first marriage and parenting. It wasn’t until I consciously revisited these imprints—what Cherionna might call “spirit into form”—that I began to heal and create healthier connections.
The Regenopause: Growing Newer, Not Older
Barbara Marx Hubbard, added another dimension to my understanding of growth. She believed that as we age, we can grow newer—not older—to activate higher levels of creativity, purpose, and spiritual alignment.
This concept transformed how I viewed my later years. I began to see ageing not as an end but as a continuation of the creative process that started in the womb. Barbara’s work inspired me to ask, “How can I use the wisdom of my experiences to regenerate myself and contribute to the world in new ways?” This question has guided me as I write, mentor, and explore the subsequent phases of my life with curiosity and excitement.
The Embodiment of Healing
Dr. van der Wal and Cherionna Menzam-Sills emphasise the importance of embodiment—reconnecting with our bodies as a source of wisdom. To grow newer, we must inhabit our bodies fully, embracing the changes and listening to the subtle messages they convey.
One practice that has helped me is pausing during moments of overwhelm to ask, “What is my body telling me?” This simple question has been a gateway to presence, helping me ground myself and respond to life’s challenges with greater clarity and compassion. I encourage this practice in my coaching and therapeutic work, as it bridges the gap between mind and spirit.
Relationships as a Mirror
Our relationships are the most powerful mirrors of our early imprints. Cherionna’s work highlights how the dynamics we experienced in the womb and during our earliest years often play out in our adult lives. For me, this was evident in the co-dependent patterns of my first marriage, where both my partner and I unconsciously sought to fill unmet childhood needs in each other.
The journey to my current marriage—one of interdependence and deep connection—required me to heal those patterns. Through tools like the DESC communication method and practices like the Daily Temperature Reading, my husband and I have built rituals honouring our individual needs while strengthening our bond. Barbara’s teachings on conscious relationships inspired me to see these practices not just as personal growth but as contributions to the evolution of humanity.
Creativity and Generativity
Dr. van der Wal’s description of the embryo as a creative force resonates with Barbara’s belief in humanity’s capacity for conscious evolution. Creativity is not limited to art or innovation; it is how we shape our lives and relationships. For me, this creativity has taken the form of writing, teaching, and mentoring others on their growth journeys.
Barbara often spoke about “vocational arousal”—the awakening of our unique purpose as we align with the evolutionary impulse of the universe. Each book I’ve written and each coaching session I’ve facilitated expresses this ongoing unfolding. It’s my way of giving back, of contributing to the collective growth of others. I often remind myself and my clients: “What are you creating with your life?” This question invites us to take ownership of our journey and embrace the possibilities of becoming.
A Legacy of Renewal
As I reflect on the wisdom of Dr. van der Wal, Cherionna Menzam-Sills, and Barbara Marx Hubbard, I see how their teachings align with my own journey of healing and growth. Their work reminds us that we are never static but continually unfolding. Barbara’s vision of Regenopause adds an inspiring dimension, encouraging us to embrace renewal at every stage of life.
In sharing my story, I hope to inspire you to do the same. To revisit your origins with curiosity. To embody the wisdom of your journey. To create a life that reflects your most authentic self. Because, as Dr. van der Wal so beautifully puts it, “The embryo is still in us.” And as Barbara taught me, we are here to grow newer, not older—to regenerate ourselves and the world around us.
What will you create with the life you’ve been given? How will you embrace your unfolding journey? The answers to these questions are the seeds of your next chapter. Let’s plant them together.
🤔What to read next? ‘Healing Your Inner Child‘ explores the journey of reconnecting with the part of you that holds the experiences, emotions and beliefs you formed in childhood.
📖Buy the e-book here!